Julie & Julia (2009)

The Meryl Streep/Amy Adams dramedy Julie & Julia is the perfect piece of summer counterprogramming against the PG-13 tempered testosterone of G. I. Joe and a rising Cobra. That it’s a pretty decent movie can only help the running time go by faster. Guys, if having to watch this is part of your quid pro blow for watching Sienna Miller, Rachel Nichols and some really huge weaponry in Joe this weekend, you could do a lot worse than J & J as you could have been rendered sterile by The Time Traveler’s Wife next week. Consider the bullet swiftly dodged...

I did feel a well-earned sigh of relief when the closing credits began to roll and everyone began to file out of the theater. Before the movie started I realized that we (me, my wife, and a homeless person we treated to the movies) were the ONLY people under the age of 50 at the screening, and I was hoping, hoping, hoping that no one would die before the lights went up, and if they did at least be quiet about it but that rarely happens as someone unavoidably screams. Inconsiderate.
There’s nothing that breaks story continuity like sirens and gurneys and the inevitable almost-hour delay that occurs when someone dies while you’re watching something in the theater. It happened during a Screening of My Sister’s Keeper last June, but I realized that after seeing that awful maudlin ending and the grating soundtrack of the worst movie of the summer, (to paraphrase from The Hills Have Eyes) those that died were the lucky ones...

Trepidation should be allayed as J & J isn’t a stupid romcom where our plucky heroine, great at her job but unlucky in love decides to air guitar on the couch to a popular song or dance randomly around a cactus with her girlfriends in scenes that have no point. It is, however, one of those movies where characters “discover” themselves, but again, don’t let that dissuade you. You also get an orgy of some of the best looking food seen onscreen in a long while as any audience will be hard-pressed not to want to dine out in a high end restaurant after the movie. Of course you could cook it yourself, but that just takes too long.

Julie & Julia is based on “2 true stories” as the ads have been hammering you with...
One, the ascendance of a 40-year old virgin (as least she was when she wed) ambassador’s wife named Julia Child (Meryl Streep, making greatness look easy as always) looking for something to fill her time and eventually becoming the one of the most recognizable cooks in the world while writing one of the, if not the, definitive French Cookbook for us “servantless” Americans. I didn’t realize there was a huge debate about French cooking in America. I also didn’t realize F. Murray Abraham had an Oscar as I think he sold me my ticket.

The other story is based on “Downtown” Julie Powell (ray of light Amy Adams as her characters never really seem down). It’s early 2002 in New York and Julie is working as a cubicle entrenched buffer for insurance claims in the wake of 9/11. A job sure to kill anyone’s spirit unless you revel in knowing that the person on the other end of the line is probably having a worse day than you. Her friends are all more successful than she is and at least have the illusion of being happy.
Julie does have a supporting, but never doormat-y husband Eric (Chris Messina), a quiet cat, dozens of batteries for her muskrat vibe, and a love for cooking as the act itself is used to wash away the dregs of her daily rut. As an act of desperation to break the monotony of her life, Julie decides to blog about a year cooking all 524 of Julia Child’s recipes from her food-breaking book Mastering the Art of French Cooking. Man, I remember way back in 2002 when a year contained 524 days...

I realize she made more than one recipe some days, but deeper research shows that she really made around 317 and just lied about all the rest while blogging out of her ass. I’m sorry for those of you that feel cheated...

Makes you wonder how unfulfilled one has to be to read a blog about someone cooking recipes. Does the reader read along with his/her own version of the Julia Child cookbook and then play Monday morning quarterback if he/she disagrees (“What a dumb bitch. Everyone KNOWS you skim the butter foam off at a low heat when you’re making Chateaubriand with Béarnaise”)?

The movie crosscuts between the year of Julie blogging and the years of Julia and her husband Paul (Stanley Tucci of that other great food movie Big Night) trying to find a publisher for her novel in a time when the marketplace was flooded with superficial but popular cookbooks. Writer/director Nora Ephron (Sleepless in Seattle, You’ve Got Mail, the Nicole Kidman/Will Ferrell flop Bewitched), keeps both stories balanced for the most part, but most importantly makes you hungry. The movie’s practically food porn and you would do well to refrain from buying popcorn or pretty much any theater “food” during the 2+ hour running time. Just make sure you’re not the one picking up the check because the bill, like your waistline, will be portly...

What works with Julie & Julia-

1) Meryl Streep...of course- I’ve only seen clips of Julia Child intermittently over my life and Streep isn’t necessarily a dead ringer for her, but dang if there aren’t some moments where you really can’t tell the difference as The Greatest Actress In the World nails Child’s loopy unique voice without a hiccup. If she can get Golden Globe nominated for Mamma fucking Mia, then Streep has got another GG nom locked as she, not a surprise, is the best character of the movie. And after seeing how the French initially treat her, you don’t feel so guilty for cheering the Cobra attack on France in G. I. Joe.

2) The funniest sequence of the movie involves the innocent slaughter of lobster, especially the shot in the backseat of a car (“Lobster Killer...”).

3) Stanley Tucci’s Paul has got to be one of the best movie husbands in recent history. His character doesn’t seem human as no person could be this kind and understanding, unless of course, he wasn’t human. Or he might have been tone deaf as I can’t imagine listening to Julia Child’s voice for however many years they were married as I can barely tolerate it in something other than recipe size doses.

4) Butter. So much butter.

What doesn’t work-

1) Despite Streep’s presence, of the 2 stories Julie Powell’s is much more interesting and you find yourself waiting for Julie’s story while you’re in Julia’s a lot more than the other way around, especially in the draggy 3rd act...

2) The “Guess who’s coming to Dinner” sequence that drags on too long considering (minor spoiler), it ultimately adds up to nothing. You waited about a half-hour of screen time for...that?

3) Again, do you know why you’re attention is flagging during the 3rd act, making the 2 hour running time feel a bit longer? Because there’s not a lot of drama inherent in the development of a COOKBOOK that can’t be sifted and fricasseed in about a hundred minutes or less. A more efficient runtime would help everyone as the majority of this movie’s demographic need to pee sporadically as every 5-10 minutes I had to lift my knees to my chest so Hume Cronyn wouldn’t hammer my legs with his cane as he ambled down the aisle.

Overall. Nora Ephron’s best work since she wrote When Harry Met Sally. She erases her back-to-back duds of Lucky Numbers and Bewitched while also providing yet another Streep showcase. If you’re forced to see this, don’t worry because you’ll like it a lot more than you think you will. Just don’t be one of those asses and keep on saying “Bon appétit” as you leave the theater as it’ll get about as annoying as your Austin Powers impression from a decade ago.