DVD Review: Trucker

Every once in a while a small film finds its way through the cracks of the movie forest, amidst Oscar hopefuls, big budget blockbusters, movies about teachers show you how to do math or dance, Holocaust movies that make you feel guilty for being alive and the only way to purge that guilt is to force yourself to watch Holocaust movies every December, and sappy family films about a dog that ends up dead by the end of the movie...

Every once in a while, I’m forced to do too much fucking overtime at work and miss a late show, and I know if I don’t turn in a review Wil is going to beat me like I was Denzel Washington in Glory only except instead of a single solitary tear shed I’m weeping like I’m both Mark Walhberg and Rachel Wiesz in The Lovely Bones and I’ve just found out my daughter has just been raped and mutilated which is not really what you want to hear during the holidays but it does free up a spot at the table but I digress because I don’t want Overseer Wil to thrash me but he just doesn’t understand what it takes to deal with a bunch of 8 to 10 year old kids who in turn don’t understand that we’re going to have to work a 14 hour day today because you kids just didn’t make the deadline and if you don’t work any harder you’re never ever going to see your mom and dad again and I don’t care if you’re tired because you’ve already had your one meal for the day this morning and I even gave you water to drink when I didn’t have to and quit your cryin’ and get to work and then I’m forced to come home late and steal my neighbor’s Netflix movie along with their commemorative stamps but leave the little brown nondescript package from Adam and Eve just so I can have something to review...

Trucker (released on DVD January 5th) is just such a movie.

Diane (Michelle Monaghan- Mission Impossible 3, Eagle Eye, Gone, Baby, Gone) is a single 30-something truck driver, relatively content with the way her life has gone, even if not completely satisfied. She’s attractive, but in a kind of off-putting way, and you can see that she has pain behind those eyes. Share with us, Diane. Share your pain...

Diane spends her nights with a married man named Runner (Nathan Fillion, from other such one-named movies like Waitress, Slither, Serenity, along with White Noise 2: Whiter and Noisier) hanging out and drinking beers. There’s an attraction between them but neither of them will cross the line because one of them is married. Tiger Woods hates this movie.

Diane’s life is predictable, but it’s safe, which is just the way she likes it. Wonder if she has a REALLY DARK SECRET that will be revealed a little past halfway into the movie. Like she’s a guy...or she got touched by her dad when she was 12...or she’s a secret agent. The audience wonders

Anyway, her idyllic truck driver life is shattered by the appearance of her 11-year old son Peter (Jimmy Bennett- thought it was oddly cast but I realized I was thinking of Jimmy Buffett). Her Baby Daddy Len (Benjamin Bratt, supposedly the father of this towheaded white kid) has been diagnosed with colon cancer and doesn’t have long to live. Len’s girlfriend Jenny (Joey Lauren Adams) has to go to her mother’s funeral. How convenient. Not for Jenny because she probably really liked her mother, but for Peter and Diane to bond like they do in all these movies.

Just Diane’s sucky luck, for she drives a truck, and is stuck with her plucky son Chuck (Peter really) while his dad is dying from some muck in his colon. Probably from eating duck.

Diane left Peter with Len years ago under the agreement that they would never meet because she’s not mother material. Apparently Len agreed but being diagnosed with Colin Farrell has forced him to break his promise.

It’s understandably awkward between them at first.

Diane calls her son Dude and more often refers to him as a little shit.

Peter replies “I don’t like to talk to bitches.” Peter also says “I hate my school and don’t have any pals.” Perfect environment for a serial killer. He’s about 36 hours away from killing his first small animal if he hasn’t already done so and has hidden them under the house.

If this were a Nora Nancy Meyers Ephron romcom, these 2 would be making out minutes before the end credits rolled, but since these characters are playing mother and son, that would prove to be a little less romantic and a lot more awkward. Because she’s so much taller than he is. And his mother.

Diane has to work, and she’s forced to take Peter with her because no one else will take him. She works hard for the money. So hard for you honey. She works hard for the money so you better treat her right. But that’s okay, because as we’ve learned from films like Rain Man and Natural Born Killers, road trips are the way to go for some serious bonding to begin.

Until...

Diane lets Peter take the wheel of the truck and he accidentally kills a family of 5 walking along a sidewalk as they’re strolling their new baby along. Peter can’t see but inches over the steering wheel and overcompensates to keep the rig straight, therefore plowing steel-grille first into The Redmonds (June, Rick, April, May, and 9-month old Rick Jr.) formerly of Plainvew, Arizona and now formerly of Earth, the World.

It’s a bloody fucking mess, with chunky pieces of the Redmond family flying into the Wendy’s Drive-thru about 20 feet away. The weird thing is nobody really notices since it’s Wendy’s.

And Diane and Peter are going to have to be very fast on their feet and clean up this Redmond mess because the police are going to be there very, very soon.

Actually, none of that family-killing happens, but they do go on a road trip.

When they get back, Diane realizes that having Peter on runs is can be a liability so she goes at it alone and lets Runner occasionally watch him. Runner proves to be a pretty decent surrogate movie father. More importantly, a surrogate movie father that isn’t currently dying of cancer.

Speaking of dying fathers, Len’s time clock is about to run to zero, and he wants to see Peter have some stability. Will Pete live with Jenny the stable one? Or will he stay with his biological that didn’t bother, but is slowly growing a fondness for (“She’s a lot lizard tramping around in dirty truck stops”). I’m not really versed in trucker lingo, but I think that’s a term of endearment.

I won’t tell you which one Peter ends up with, but you can probably guess. Unless there’s a 3rd more tragic ending that you won’t see coming. You’ll just have to watch. And no, the truck does not transform into Optimus Prime.

What works with Trucker-

Not that she’s been in a lot of movies that feature her as the main character, but this is Michelle Monaghan’s best work ever. She gets to do a lot of things actors dream of, like scream and cry and fuck and curse and then show a vulnerable side. Actor Olympics Candy. Most importantly, she is very believable as a mother trucker, and you see her doing very truckerly things with no actress vanity. And there are no obvious cutaways to a big burly guy pumping gas or changing tires. Hopefully Monaghan gets work of larger scale and better quality.

Diane can beat someone’s ass...in her underwear. That might not be considered fair because it’s kind of distracting, but a fight is a fight.

Peter proves very handy with a bat. Sure, he can’t play baseball for shit, but he can sure swing away.

A perfectly executed final scene tenderly directed by writer/director James Mottern. One of the best, simplest endings of 2009.

What doesn’t work-

Though it’s very well done, the arcs are familiar, and there are very few things that even the most remedial viewer won’t see coming. That still shouldn’t dissuade you from seeing this very good movie.

Way too much country music. That may dissuade you from seeing this very good movie.

Overall. Not feeling desperate enough to rent the idiotic The Final Destination? Don’t want to waste time and gas looking for a parking spot at the theater because of virgi—I mean, fans seeing Avatar for the 6th or 7th time. Rent Trucker and be grateful. Or rent Trucker and watch it on a laptop or something while you’re waiting for a parking spot. At a trim 90 minutes, you might just get lucky. Just make sure you pay attention to your driving, because there are the Redmonds just around the corner...